my mom suddenly came out from her room and asked me to go sleep.
i was like, since when she start showing me concern?
then i replied okok will sleep soon.
then she went back to her room.
then she came out again.
and screamed at me 'YOU WANNA SPOIL MY COMPUTER THEN HAPPY ISIT?!'
gave me a fright.
but other than that, i didn't really feel anything.
so she wasn't concerned about me sleeping late. she was concerned about her laptop.
right now she's like nagging nonstop over me using her laptop till it spoil. or rather till it gonna spoil.
hello? this laptop has been alive and kicking for 3 yrs le i think. not that i wanna curse it, but i think time's up soon lah.
wth.
i thought my parents were so concerned about me. SO CONCERNED about me indeed that they gave me ZERO opinion for my uni course app. totally straight face. but my dad jus wish that i can study locally. thats all.
wells.
don't parents have some expectations or wishes for their children?
i don't get it.
1:26 AM
Thursday, March 27, 2008
oh man.
i just checked my email.
good news plus bad news.
i needa give an answer, make up my mind by this friday.
gosh. hell.
anyway, screwed up connection.
i typed this entry THRICE ytd, but each time its error. so wells, screwed up. and i hope it doesnt screw up again. cuz ytd i also applied for ntu stuff like 2 or 3 times. but screwed up. LOL.
okays anw happy bday karen! =D
i just wanna go drinking and mad and drunk=)
12:42 AM
Saturday, March 22, 2008
was that a sign of declaring war?
i think it is.
i think one should really practice some self-censorship though at times u can voice out your unhappiness. what you typed and what you said today was like, a total different thing. so that makes me the bad guy. and maybe i am, but is this fair now?
went for driving practical today and my legs are totally soured now. LOL. i just wonder why they are so sour. kinda interesting! i think it's fun so. yup. hahax. and my reactions are super -.-.. can tell from the instructor's face. he looks kinda beng, but he's still decent though the actions are abit =.=
okays! submitted psc scholarship app for fun. u noe why for fun? cuz i put med as first choice. lol. cant even get in, much less to say scholarship for that.
anw, had a chat with ms ho, and i feel so discouraged. i think i shouldn't even try. =X
aw, please tell me how now.
12:01 AM
Monday, March 17, 2008
okay fruitful day to nus with an old fren today!
sort of made up my mind to apply for yll, after talking to this lady. but now i'm reconsidering again. this is too risky. because i dun have a strong backup course for uni. okay maybe biomed tcm but there's simply too many factors to consider. and okay maybe teaching, but then again...maybe, i could try some funny engineering! lol. i dun look like an engineer i think.
then at night, after talking to so so many people. i'm like deviated from the thought above. HAHA. VASCILLATING.
why must yll be so hard to get in? haiz. passionate but scared. cuz its like, bu gan gao pan wo zi ji.
and grace told me, her brain is totally fried. i think mine is too. hahax i like the term- fried brain. LOLX.
someone asked me today about the personality test(which i dun recall taking), am i an introvert or an extrovert. i really dunno? lol. i think im just someone who thinks too much. rofl.
12:20 AM
Saturday, March 15, 2008
mad mad day.
law school is DAMN nice. SO COLONIAL. but besides the school compound, the courses there dun really interest me. hahax, and i still think i'm for healthcare.
but there's a really big prob. and i dunno what i should do. OH MAN. it's like i have to decide like real soon. and i dunno how to decide. roars. every night i think about it i wanna cry, and the teachers are not helping either. they are totally NOT RESPONDING to my sms-es and i think most people face this problem. i mean like, i thought teachers are suppose to feel happy for their students who are going to take up scholarships and be more than willing to help. guess im too naive.
and i think i really am too naive. so many things happened and i think i've possess more resistance now.
8:33 PM
woah terrible.
i had the most difficult night yesterday, trying to sleep and trying not to think so much. hell man. and i'm ever so confused and dunno what to do. dunno what to do with my life and SHOOTS people are like heck but i can't!! cuz i've only got 4days left it's either take it or leave it. HOW?
i wish someone could just answer me how. and stop ps-ing.
9:20 AM
Sunday, March 09, 2008
quite pissed just now. cuz two times in two days. REALLY ANGRY. and i don't think those people who made me really mad knows that i am mad. and that is the ultimate problem.
and i find some of my friends who are trying out their luck for that course, like me, are acting abit weird. like doing what they did and i got really dudiao-ed.
yes, i get angry easily, but thats really the limit OK. and i have to start making plans. cuz its so maddening and i don't want it to happen again the coming week. bloody. toot.
had a great meal with chickenfloss just now. and helped celebrate even though its after a year. LOL. chickenfloss is a great friend! =D
and so much for making myself happy through food.
i'm at the crossroad now, just like what grace said. everyone is. sigh.
8:38 PM
Sunday, March 02, 2008
heart to heart talks.
today had two rounds of heart to heart talks.
i guess it made us feel alot better knowing there are others who are caught in the same, or worse situation, and that we are not alone.
busy busy life.
sometimes i really wonder. what do i really want?
maybe, just a shoulder for me to lean on, to weap on, and a pair of listening ears always ready to hear me out, my sorrows, and a pair of hands that could bring me tissue to dry my tears for me.
